Who am I trying to kid?
I’m really thinking about taking a break from blogging.
My life really sucks right now, that depression I thought I had beat is back with a vengeance, and I just can’t think straight anymore… not to mention the fact that there is nothing to write about…Nothing new going on, no chance really for anything interesting to happen.
I feel so tied up. I feel like I am at the bottom of a well with a ton of rock on top of me… No way I’m going anywhere… I just can’t figure out a way to make my brain accept that this is my life from now on… I can’t get rid of those longings to go places, and do things, and meet new people… experience life… without Rick there embarrassing me…Maybe I was not cut out to be a wife and mother, although I wouldn’t give Isaiah up for anything… Maybe I just wasn’t meant to be a wife…LOL
I just don’t think I am in any kind of mindset to be posting… Ya’ll will get tired of my depressing crap and stop reading! LOL
So if I don’t blog for a few days, I’m still here… I’m probably just sleeping…I’m so tired of trying to be positive – I feel like I am having to carry so much on my shoulders, and I just can’t keep it up… there is nothing good in my life anymore… I just can’t keep it up….
I have felt, for weeks now, the tears right behind my eyes, wanting to fall, but I'm afraid they will never stop....
My life really sucks right now, that depression I thought I had beat is back with a vengeance, and I just can’t think straight anymore… not to mention the fact that there is nothing to write about…Nothing new going on, no chance really for anything interesting to happen.
I feel so tied up. I feel like I am at the bottom of a well with a ton of rock on top of me… No way I’m going anywhere… I just can’t figure out a way to make my brain accept that this is my life from now on… I can’t get rid of those longings to go places, and do things, and meet new people… experience life… without Rick there embarrassing me…Maybe I was not cut out to be a wife and mother, although I wouldn’t give Isaiah up for anything… Maybe I just wasn’t meant to be a wife…LOL
I just don’t think I am in any kind of mindset to be posting… Ya’ll will get tired of my depressing crap and stop reading! LOL
So if I don’t blog for a few days, I’m still here… I’m probably just sleeping…I’m so tired of trying to be positive – I feel like I am having to carry so much on my shoulders, and I just can’t keep it up… there is nothing good in my life anymore… I just can’t keep it up….
I have felt, for weeks now, the tears right behind my eyes, wanting to fall, but I'm afraid they will never stop....
posted by Amethyst Rising at 2:21 PM
5 Comments:
Maybe it's just something going around. A lot of blogs out there seem depressing right now, I'm getting ready to post depressing crap to my own. Keep posting otherwise you'll lose one of your places to vent and the depression might only get worse.
Thanks, Shaun...I just hate to keep posting the same crap! LOL...
By the way... Do you have your new sight up yet?
Am, hang in there honey. Things will get better. This is just another mountain that you need to go round. He will never put you through anything that he doesn't give you a way out from. Check out Jeremiah 29:11. Remember you have friends that love you. Blog if you want. Or not. We'll still be here, no matter which.
Thank you, Jules... My life for the past 8 months just seems like one long mountain range...LOL
I just don't like to keep harping on the same 'ol stuff... So I guess when all I can think of is problems I will just blog about history, or news or something...LOL
thanks again... Don't know what I would do without you all...
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