What do you think - psychological abuse?
"EDMOND, Okla. - Tasha Henderson got tired of her 14-year-old daughter's poor grades, her chronic lateness to class and her talking back to her teachers, so she decided to teach the girl a lesson.
She made Coretha stand at a busy Oklahoma City intersection Nov. 4 with a cardboard sign that read: "I don't do my homework and I act up in school, so my parents are preparing me for my future. Will work for food."
"This may not work. I'm not a professional," said Henderson, a 34-year-old mother of three. "But I felt I owed it to my child to at least try."
In fact, Henderson has seen a turnaround in her daughter's behavior in the past week and a half. But the punishment prompted letters and calls to talk radio from people either praising the woman or blasting her for publicly humiliating her daughter.
"The parents of that girl need more education than she does if they can't see that the worst scenario in this case is to kill their daughter psychologically," Suzanne Ball said in a letter to The Oklahoman.
Marvin Lyle, 52, said in an interview: "I don't see anything wrong with it. I see the other extreme where parents don't care what the kids do, and at least she wants to help her kid."
Coretha has been getting C's and D's as a freshman at Edmond Memorial High in this well-to-do Oklahoma City suburb. Edmond Memorial is considered one of the top high schools in the state in academics.
While Henderson stood next to her daughter at the intersection, a passing motorist called police with a report of psychological abuse, and an Oklahoma City police officer took a report. Mother and daughter were asked to leave after about an hour, and no citation was issued. But the report was forwarded to the state Department of Human Services.
"There wasn't any criminal act involved that the officer could see that would require any criminal investigation," Master Sgt. Charles Phillips said. "DHS may follow up."
DHS spokesman Doug Doe would not comment on whether an investigation was opened, but suggested such a case would probably not be a high priority.
Tasha Henderson said her daughter's attendance has been perfect and her behavior has been better since the incident.
Coretha, a soft-spoken girl, acknowledged the punishment was humiliating but said it got her attention. "I won't talk back," she said quietly, hanging her head.
She already has been forced by her parents to give up basketball and track because of slipping grades, and said she hopes to improve in school so she can play next year.
Donald Wertlieb, a professor of child development at the Eliot-Pearson Department of Child Development at Tufts University, warned that such punishment could do extreme emotional damage. He said rewarding positive behavior is more effective.
"The trick is to catch them being good," he said. "It sounds like this mother has not had a chance to catch her child being good or is so upset over seeing her be bad, that's where the focus is."
(article HERE)
She made Coretha stand at a busy Oklahoma City intersection Nov. 4 with a cardboard sign that read: "I don't do my homework and I act up in school, so my parents are preparing me for my future. Will work for food."
"This may not work. I'm not a professional," said Henderson, a 34-year-old mother of three. "But I felt I owed it to my child to at least try."
In fact, Henderson has seen a turnaround in her daughter's behavior in the past week and a half. But the punishment prompted letters and calls to talk radio from people either praising the woman or blasting her for publicly humiliating her daughter.
"The parents of that girl need more education than she does if they can't see that the worst scenario in this case is to kill their daughter psychologically," Suzanne Ball said in a letter to The Oklahoman.
Marvin Lyle, 52, said in an interview: "I don't see anything wrong with it. I see the other extreme where parents don't care what the kids do, and at least she wants to help her kid."
Coretha has been getting C's and D's as a freshman at Edmond Memorial High in this well-to-do Oklahoma City suburb. Edmond Memorial is considered one of the top high schools in the state in academics.
While Henderson stood next to her daughter at the intersection, a passing motorist called police with a report of psychological abuse, and an Oklahoma City police officer took a report. Mother and daughter were asked to leave after about an hour, and no citation was issued. But the report was forwarded to the state Department of Human Services.
"There wasn't any criminal act involved that the officer could see that would require any criminal investigation," Master Sgt. Charles Phillips said. "DHS may follow up."
DHS spokesman Doug Doe would not comment on whether an investigation was opened, but suggested such a case would probably not be a high priority.
Tasha Henderson said her daughter's attendance has been perfect and her behavior has been better since the incident.
Coretha, a soft-spoken girl, acknowledged the punishment was humiliating but said it got her attention. "I won't talk back," she said quietly, hanging her head.
She already has been forced by her parents to give up basketball and track because of slipping grades, and said she hopes to improve in school so she can play next year.
Donald Wertlieb, a professor of child development at the Eliot-Pearson Department of Child Development at Tufts University, warned that such punishment could do extreme emotional damage. He said rewarding positive behavior is more effective.
"The trick is to catch them being good," he said. "It sounds like this mother has not had a chance to catch her child being good or is so upset over seeing her be bad, that's where the focus is."
(article HERE)
posted by Amethyst Rising at 11:19 PM
6 Comments:
I know lots of people will disagree but I think it was inventive parenting and no doubt effective. She didn't tell her she was no good or stupid. The sign wasn't insulting to her at all. It said that this is where the girl would end up with out taking the advantages being offered her.
I know from experience that a lack of education makes finding and keeping good paying jobs difficult or impossible. The girl is old enough to grasp that concept. At 14 she needed a wake up call. If this were a younger child I'd say it might be abusive but not to a teen in the "know it all" stage.
The girl should concider herself blessed to have a mom that gives a damn about her and her future.
I agree with twocents. Thank heavens her mother cared enough about her to do something at the onset. I believe that some kids these days don't understand consequences for their actions, standing up and taking responsibility. Bless her mother for teaching her child that now. Too many parents "reward for the positive" and do NOTHING about the negative. That doesn't help the child. Negative behavior should have negative consequences. At least this child woke up and saw where her life was headed. Good for her. Her future is looking brighter already. Education is EVERYTHING to your future. Thanks for sharing this article.
I'm making the signs right now and will start scouting safe street corners as soon as possible... After you've tried everything else and nothing works; I say go out on a limb and try something inventive. If it doesn't work you're still where you left off; if it does WHOOPPEE. Kids make mistakes; parents make mistakes--as long as they are mistakes with good intentions why care what anyone thinks.
I have to agree. Better for the child to suffer a little public humiliation for things she was already doing in front of the world anyways! Perhaps the other people would prefer to see her at 15, strung out on drugs, pregnant and dependant upon the state to live?
None of my older children has ever skipped a class...they have been told that I will come to school with them and attend each and every class with them if they do. They decided that they did NOT want to risk that, so they never miss a class.
The mother did not say she was stupid or anything else excepting that if she did not get to work...she would wind up like that. I had a teacher in high school that would hand out McDonalds applications to students who didn't apply themselves, tell them they might as well get started now if they didn't want to work for anything else. I can think of a hundred other situations also.
No one saw if she ever praises her child...they don't know.
What happened to the kids who were part of the never say no generation? It seems that idea was discarded....
Kids need boundaries and they need to know that their actions ahve consequences. period.
magdala~
Jas, I don't think it was so sudden, reading through different articles on the net about it, the girl said that she had been having things taken away from her, apparently that did not work. Apparently the problems were mainly at school not home. Some kids are like that. Some are worse at home and great at school. Maybe she just needed a wake up call. I dunno. At any rate, I think that those who were saying it was emotional abuse...I can think of much, much worse things I have heard parents say to their kids than what this woman did.
Just my opinion :)
magdala~
I'm fourteen & my parents are divorced. If my dad ever tried to do that to me I'd take a bus to my mom's house in Dallas.
Post a Comment
<< Home